The Mortis Gazette #14
Stupendous Statistics
We all know that the arena in Mox City is the place for summoners to showcase their talents and battle their way to fame and fortune. But for some, the most tantalizing part of the arena is the numbers. Wins, losses, who summoned what, what prizes were won and so much more. Many people have taken to crunching the numbers on these magical combatants for fun and sometimes for profit.
Oddsmakers and statisticians have a multitude of data to work with where the summoners are concerned. But for those new to the arena, it can be overwhelming. That may soon change however.
A local number-smith, @kiokizz, has devised a method by which anyone interested can get whatever information they require. He has set up shop near the arena @splinterstats and is encouraging all to visit and peruse his gathered knowledge.
Currently @kiokizz gathers reward information, league information and information on mystery rewards but there are rumours he will soon be adding season reports customised to the individual, with even more in depth information.
If you are interested and near Mox City, check out @splinterstats and follow his progress to stay up to date on all your arena information needs.
Raging About Rivers
Recently, several businesses were issued fines after being caught dumping waste into the river. Dyemakers and wood pulp processing plants were the largest offenders in these incidents.
The Council of Barons recently changed the laws surrounding the disposal of toxic waste products. For many years, businesses and regular citizens alike were permitted to dump as they wished into the river. The laws were changed in response to several school children becoming ill after swimming at several of the local riverside beaches.
During the implementation of these new laws, many prominent business owners were protesting outside Council Hall citing the unfair costs associated with the stricter environmental laws. Counter protesters refuted these claims stating the business owners had more than enough cash on hand to easily sort out the problems and to follow the laws as written.
After the grace period passed, The Constabulary was ordered to enforce the laws strictly and without delay, resulting in no less than 2500 gold pieces worth of fines. The Council also ordered the construction of a waste water plant to deal with the extra wastes and were offering it free of charge to any business owners who required it. Still these businesses went on with their now-criminal actions.
Hopefully lessons have been learned and our river can be beautiful once more.
The Sewers Again!
More unexplained noises have been coming from the sewers beneath Beluroc. The previous times this has happened, metal beasts and automatons have gone on rampages through the city's streets. The recurrence of these noises has led to the citizenry putting out a call for an investigation into the cause.
Scoutmaster Harris Donderbunt approached the Gazette to issue the following statement:
"We intend, with the blessing of The Council, to take several scouting parties into the sewers in two days. As a warning to all citizens, a strict curfew will be in place during these incursions into the sewer system. For the safety of all, take the day off and stay inside with your loved ones, anyone on the street will be detained and removed from public for safety reasons.
"We assure all, this will be figured out and dealt with as soon as possible and with the utmost interest in both safety and expediency. Thank you."
It is dire indeed if a city that prides itself on personal freedoms is asking its citizens to remain inside. Nevertheless, the Gazette encourages everyone to comply with the Scoutmaster's request.
Android Summoners
Lately complaints have been filed with the Wizards of Praetoria concerning android summoners participating in the games. Straight mechanical and mostly unthinking constructs have been logging wins in the arena and some summoners are not happy about it. In a rare moment of agreement, The Wizard of Eastwood and The Magi of The Forest released a joint statement.
"We citizens of Anumun believe that constructs have their place, serving sentient beings that can rightly guide their actions. This perversion of nature that is androids performing their own summonings is an affront to any right-minded and sane summoner."
While the Wizards have released no official statement, sources inform the Gazette that the Wizards may not agree entirely with the popular opinion in opposition to the construct summoners but see no real issue. If a summoner cannot compete against a mindless automaton, then what business do they have being in the arena in any case.
Another summoner who asked not to be named had this to say:
"Git Gud Son."
Despite the controversy the Gazette agrees; Git gud indeed.
Wise Wilson's Wicker Wicks
Tired of Twining your Own Hemp for candle wicks?
Well, come on down to Wise Wilson's Wicker Wicks!
We're weaving wicker wicks weekly!
Bundle deals and bulk orders available.
Come to the dockside market and see for yourself!
Look for the inflatable candle near Silvermire Fountain.
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As We Live and Breathe, That's The News.
Poor androids... they never get any love... 😢