Its Hard, But Must Let Go

“Please, you have to forgive me because I do not know what comes over me. I have been observing and wanting to reconcile with you for all these years, but your look could not let me in. Please find it in your heart to forgive me for real," my neighbor said.

“It's in the past now, and I never keep the last within me,” I said as we hugged each other. For real, I have forgiven her.

I went to the filling station to buy some fuel with my neighbor some time last year, but the unexpected happened.

Lisa Summer

I could not believe what my neighbor did to me. We both left the house to buy fuel at the filling station, smiling at each other, but we came back separated. I was so mad with the character she had put up, and every normal human being would not take it lightly with such a person.

She is someone who knows people in the filling station, and then she used her influence to overtake so many people in the queue. It happened during the fuel scarcity, when everyone was finding it difficult to buy fuel. After getting to the filling station, we were so lucky that we met her friend, who was part of those sales. He was smiling, while I was so happy that we would be coming home on time. She gave her keg to the gentleman, leaving mine behind. I looked at her, believing she knew what he was doing. The look on her face showed that she knew exactly what she was doing. I kept on wondering if I had done something wrong or had done something to her before. The more I think, the more I keep not seeing something of that nature.

I could not ask her, but I just held on to hear her say something to me. We both talked and laughed at each other a while ago when we were coming, but now it's so pathetic that we had to go back together. I was unable to talk to her while she was also playing along by not talking to me any more. This kept baffling me, as I was unable to pinpoint any fault or anything I had done to wrong her. I wanted to call her just to ask if I had done something wrong to her, but then I had to think twice and retreat my words.

As she was going home, she said, “See you later.” I kept mute with a swollen face, just like someone who has not eaten for the past four days. I was filled with anger, which would soon explode.

We went to the filling station by 6 p.m., and I left around 9 p.m. The queue was so long, with different cars packed. I had to go home, relenting, thinking of what my neighbor had done to me. I could not put on my generator, but my husband had to put it on somehow just to calm me down after letting him know about what had happened.

The next day, I passed by my neighbor without greeting her. It's unlike me, and everyone knew I would always greet them no matter what. This time, what my neighbor had done to me pained me to my marrow.

She came to my shop to buy some foodstuffs, but I could not smile with her as before. I had to put up a bold face, and I could see on her face that she was ready to say “sorry” for what happened, but I was not ready to accept any apology. After looking at my face, she was unable to say a word and instead bought what she came to buy and left.

We kept on with this act for about four months before my husband later called me to let the last out of me and start greeting her. I was not ready to listen, but then who am I to jump over my husband's words?

When I was passing by, I greeted her and left. She could not wait a minute to respond, as if she had been waiting for this. The next day, she called me and said, “I knew I had done wrong. Please, just forgive me. This will not happen ever again.”.

I was just observing the way she was behaving, but then I had to let it go as I was not ready to disobey my husband's command. .

“Oh, it's in the past now. I never keep that in mind. It's gone now," I said, and she hugged me tightly.