This is a short fanfic story (under 1,000 words) about a Splinterlands card character. I used the existing lore page as a loose prompt. If there’s a card you’d like to hear a story about, vote for it in the comments :)

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Blam!cakes a la Grund

“Fighting. It’s hungry work,” said Grund.

A patrol detail of Goblins and Venari followed the hulking reptile along a swampy forest path. They kept their distance from his thick, swishing tail.

“And rations,” Grund continued. “They don’t fill the warrior’s soul.”

The sun filtered out of the dead leaves above. The deepening purples of the sky began to blend with the gloomy woods. No insect noise rose to greet them—it had all but stopped in this part of the world since the War had begun. Venari ears perked up, Goblin eyes scanned for movement off the path.

Grund lumbered onward, heaving squelching mud with each stride. He twisted his head nearly right around to stare over his shoulder. “Don’t you agree?”

The lead Venari scout and Goblin thief exchanged a glance.

“Wh—” began the Goblin.

“Sor—” started the Venari.

With practiced grace, Grund stopped and spun to face them. The Goblin stumbled as she flinched to avoid getting a faceful of tail.

“I said don’t you agree?” boomed Grund. “Rations! The worst.”

The entire company halted as the last of the light died away.

“Rations, yeah, not great, no,” said the Venari. He glanced around for help. No one else seemed interested in chiming in.

“Untenable! Flavorless, mealy, and cruel!” said Grund. “A fire, pronto. We’re here to fix problems, and Chaos is not the only priority.”

“Fire? Here?” someone asked, further back.

“And now!” said Grund. He jammed one of his warhammers headfirst into the soft earth. “And bring me what berries we’ve scavenged.”

“Er, perimeter, too?” asked the Goblin.

Grund rummaged around in his carrypack. “Hm? Sure, if it makes you feel better. Ah.” He pulled out an extra large brick of rations and tossed it on the ground. The Goblin backed away, issuing orders in hushed tones. Several others began to fan out, unsheathing weapons and looking for trees to perch in.

Nearby, a pair of Venari started to work on the fire. Grund beckoned them.

“Over here. Around this.” He kicked over the warhammer he’d planted, so that the flat business end faced the night sky.

“Around it? As in… the fire? Sir?”

“Indeed. Now, who has the berries?”

As the firewood was piled up around Grund’s weapon, he went to work on the rations. With a borrowed blade, he cut the big, bready brick in two. Then he stabbed it. A lot. He stuffed the stab holes with berries as his minions watched in fascination.

The fire started to gather strength. Before long, a scout ran into the ring of firelight, eyes wide. “Sir, sir, we have multiple unknowns en route. Sounds airborne.”

“Right on time,” said Grund, smiling. “Prepare for a special kind of combat lesson.”

A flicking, flittering sound could now be heard over the snap and crackle of the fire. It was almost a buzz. All around Grund, the Goblins and Venari readied their bows and knives. Grund placed his berry-stuffed rations onto the hot head of his first warhammer. He hefted his other one.

“Dinner’s served!” cried Grund, as a dozen giant, mothlike bugs raced in from overhead. Twice as many arrows and throwing knives launched upward, and a few moths crashed into the ground. Most of them, however, flew right over to the rations.

The serpentine warrior raised his massive warhammer like a Human might a flyswatter. Then he slapped the moths into the ration-berry block with a short snap. Hard enough to mash a chunk of bugs into the rations, gentle enough so that it didn’t all explode outward.

“You let it sizzle for about two minutes,” he explained to the stunned crowd. “These things are salty and full of good fat. Bug butter, we used to call ‘em! Wings add a nice crunch too.”

Surviving moths swirled around and above the fire, knocking into one another harmlessly. The Goblin thief stood nearby, blinking. She wiped a stringy mess of goo and berries off her cheek.

“That’s… that’s why… you…” she stopped. Her nose twitched. “... Anumun’s Ashes, that smells…”

“...Incredible,” said a Venari next to her. The gathering moved closer.

“You can snipe down the rest of them if you like,” said Grund, teeth glistening in amber hues. “We’ll be ready for another batch of rations soon. However, I must say. I do prefer the active approach.”

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Thank you for reading!	This story was inspired by:
If you have a favourite card that you'd like to see a story written about, leave a comment or upvote someone else's comment. Whichever card comes out on top: I'll use its lore page as a prompt to write a story under 1,000 words.	As a new player, Grund is one of my early favourite cards. This guide video by @synist3r is what led me Grund, and ultimately this tale!

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