Daily Routine #1: "The Unprepared Newbie"

This is yet another writing experiment: I would like to start describing (for fun) the different daily routines on Splinterlands, I'll start describing the daily routine of the character I know the best cause I always feel like him: The Unprepared Newbie.

07:00 AM: The U.N. (Unprepared Newbie) wakes up and reads randomly on "FatWhale69" Twitter about Splinterlands, a trading card game where you can gain real cryptocurrency, FatWhale69 says he gains 300$ per day, easy. The U.N. immediately downloads the app using FatWhale69's referral link and starts playing knowing nothing, because if you lose time thinking in the crypto world you are lost.

09:30 AM: After two and half hours the heroic U.N. reaches 80 in rating, now he knows that melee monsters go first, ranged not first, and the monsters with the purple cloud used with the bearded wizard are really good, he's still waiting to gain some Bitcoin playing.

11:00 AM: Our favorite U.N. just discovered the in-game chat, a kind guy explained to him in the official game language (a mix between English and an undefined language) how to use power blocks to climb rankings and what the Spellbook is.
The U.N. is confused but he will not surrender, he just needs to create a Paypal account and buy the Spellbook.

01:00 PM: PayPal: created, SpellBook: purchased, Bronze III: reached, Bitcoin gained:0
Our hero doesn't understand what's happening, he should already be rich. Searching online he discovers the official Telegram group, he needs to eat to restore energy, then he will be ready for the second round of learning Splinterlands.

02:30 PM: The Telegram group is where angels explain hell to the U.N.
Some of the kindest people ever met on the internet patiently explain to him some of the Splinterlands truths: you gain the game cryptocurrency, not Bitcoin after you reach Bronze II, to reach Bronze II you need a certain Card Power, renting exists, external tools to rent and buy cards exist, there's an airdrop, there's another in-game currency, there's a blog where you can gain another type of crypto and they continue to patiently explain to him everything he needs to know and warn him about Telegram's scam messages.

06:00 PM: The U.N. is a bit stressed, he doesn't understand why he needs vouchers to buy cards packs and why vouchers would protect a small player like him from the whales, he doesn't live near the sea and he isn't named Pinocchio...
After smiling at his own sad joke he starts the daily quest because he finally feels competitive, winning 2 credits and feeling that this is the start of something great, he will be rich because he is so much smarter than the other 500k players.

08:00 PM: He lost 12 battles consecutively, "but it's all about the experience", he tells himself, I will be better tomorrow, now I am the experienced player who will eat the little fishes.
Before going to eat he requests the keys because he wants to share his formidable first day on Splinterlands with the whole community.

11:00 PM: The Newbie spent 2 hours blogging about his first day and telling everybody what the secret to gaining real big money on Splinterlands is, he has the experience, the cards, he just invested in DECs and SPS... basically, he is ready for Gold 1 at least, he just wants to check Telegram before going bed, better to be always aware of the last news.
Our Newbie, not anymore unprepared just received a message on Telegram from an admin, he wants to help him with a problem he didn't know he had. Before going to bed our Experienced Newbie sends to the kind admin all his Hive Keys and closes his eyes and telephone, he is happy, the admin will solve all the problems he didn't know he had and from tomorrow he will start his road to Lambo.

Obviously, it's a fictional story, just for fun, it was really hard to write something like that and I don't know if it's interesting or funny enough.
Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Best Regards,
Mr. Magalli

P.S. my referral link: https://splinterlands.com?ref=magalli