The Quick and the Dead/Just Like Jessie James
Well, well, well... here we are again.
Come together wizards and warriors to once again congregate and worship in the Temple of the Winged Sandal. I just can't preach enough of The Gospel of Speed so we might as well get started.
I've been wanting to toss out a post on The Little Guys and I guess today is the day. This battle inspires praise!
Here's the lineup and Rules of Engagement:
And here's everyone buffed and ready to slug it out!
Let's Check the Stats!!
You know what? Screw them all, except Speed!
Just look at those speed bumps (OMFG!!) but don't even worry about anyone except Naga Assassin! She's the hero of the day! Everyone else just tries to keep up.
I spoke about this deadly vixen in a recent post, and I thought I gave her all the respect and praise she deserves, but today she dropped by to reveal my education is severely lacking. This lady just keeps impressing.
...Which is why I've invited her as our honorary guest in today's sermon. Let's listen to what she has to say...
To start, I was thrilled to achieve a factor of 6/speed adjustment! I have gotten higher in the past but it's tough to find the right mesh of monsters that can come together so seamlessly as to allow for higher, so this is close to Mecca for me!
Let's take a look at our girl suited up!
MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMM MMMMMMMMMM!!!!!! YUMMM-MEE!!
Just look at the confidence radiating from her as she steps up scantily dressed in her most skimpy attire... wearing only three abilities for us to peek...
Let's start with the Byzantine Brand Nipple Pasties insuring everyone's attention is spot on, just where she wants it, and then slither down to the winged sandals that she makes always fashionable.... slipping quietly by the lower back tat only the dead have seen.
It's hard to know where to start since this battle was over so quickly, but I have to at least mention the Utter Humiliation of Exploding Dwarf.
This small town dude, with a big city attitude, rolled up on our girl all struttin' like he was slingin' a gun, but honey, I'm here to tell you, he met his match, tonight.
She saw him coming a mile away, and turned little slick rick into a grease spot before he even got to sling his game. There was nothing left to bring in dead or alive!
I told you our girl don't play!!
So while she's cleaning up, a few teammates step up and handle a few things she totally could've have taken care of herself, but you gotta let the imps play, too, or they'll find something else to do and take away that sweet uncut swiftness and black tar slow we need to set the mood the way we like it.
So here we are, at the end of round 1 and we can see she's already shining!
No one laid a hand on her sexy ass, but everyone left standing paid the price for trying! Damn, that's gotta sting!!
Let's move on to round 2!
I don't have to say anything here. The crew mopped up whoever was left save GUESS WHO!!
Little sister steps up, and, low and behold, is the only player on the board who lands a blow before being swiftly dispatched at the beginning of round 3.
I could, and, maybe should, end here, but that would only cover half of today's topic...
The Little Guys
I usually notice how impressed I am with some of the lower mana cards when using the Death splinter, but this is a great showing of how valuable the little ones can be.
I chose to spend big mana on BK for the obvious benefits of swiftness x2, and the Aim True ability, but I really thought I'd need the healing to off set any magic attackers.
Luckily, there weren't any, as just one and a little luck might have changed the course of this battle entirely. Maybe there's a lesson in there, somewhere, along the lines of always try to bring a mage if you can... but that don't mean jack here so let's keep it rolling!
So, having spent such a big chuck of my mana cap to summon a god, I didn't have enough left to throw together a team of titans, but the whole point of this section is to emphasize I didn't need to.
Using only 2 and 3 mana cost cards I was able to summon a very formidable team that neutralized the opponent almost effortlessly.
And that brings us to a close with the (hopefully) wise words, Get the lead out of thine arse, lest ye find a dagger in yer heart!
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