The Mortis Gazette #9

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(Edited)

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Dragon Dogfight!

Anyone outside the city walls early in the evening two nights ago was treated to a spectacular and terrifying display. Two dragons, unidentified due to distance, appeared to be engaged in some sort of aerial combat.

Bright flashes in the night frightened residents and caused alarms to be raised. This alerted the City Guards, who investigated, through use of spyglasses, the distant light show. The ballistae on the walls were loaded and readied for the first time in years.

But they were not needed. After several minutes the flashes stopped without any fanfare or subsequent danger. Although the alarm was dropped, the Council of Barons has decreed that several groups of scouts will be sent to investigate.

The Council also recommends that all travel to the southern mountains be temporarily suspended for the safety of Beluroc's citizens. The Gazette will have our own reporters investigate and bring you the truth of what happened.

Keep an eye out for future updates.

Tricksters At Large

The Council of Lords and the Constabulary have issued a joint statement:

Be it known that in, around and within the Beluroc city limits has been spotted a particularly pervasive criminal element. These people have committed repeated and reviling criminal acts over the past few weeks.

Citizens should be aware that despite the criminals' statements to the contrary, holding a certain token in a certain place for any amount of time should never guarantee you vast wealth. Terms these ne'er'do'wells use frequently are: Eth, Axie and Uniswap. Citizens are hereby warned to avoid anyone suggesting you have won anything using those terms or guarantees you a massive return should you give them money.

The Constabulary has been equipped with "Bright and Nobby" hammers, or "B.A.N. Hammers", to deal with these hooligans as is deemed necessary.

The Gazette does not understand these terms, but hopefully this helps all of you out there.

Above article is intended as a Public Service Announcement and not any sort of advice, financial or otherwise. The Gazette offers no viewpoint one way or the other.

Swimmers Beware

Several schools of sharks, called Wave Runners by some, have been spotted off the northern coasts of Mortis. While not specifically a danger to most citizens of Beluroc, fishermen are expected to remain aware.

The sharks are known for leaping out of the water to "knock out" their prey. Though they seem reluctant to attack humanoid creatures.

The reason for the migration of these schools is currently unknown. Marine Researcher Yeen Arvyngale has assured the people of Beluroc that there is nothing to be concerned about so long as you remain aware of your surroundings when on or near the water.

Ducks!

A farmer's wagon crashed into the fountain at the centre of Centre Market Square today. The driver allegedly fell asleep as they were driving the horses through the city. The cargo broke open upon impact and released dozens of bluebill ducks into the market.

The ensuing chaos put a halt to the day's trading as feathers and screams began flying everywhere. Several market-goers reported minor injuries, though none serious. Several of the ducks were unfortunately trampled in the resulting tumult.

The driver of the wagon, Ruthie Forrester, has been held pending an investigation.

Currently the ducks have taken over the fountain and seem content to remain where they are until everything is sorted out.


Crazy Pete's Luggage and Rugs!
Fine and Fancy Woven Handcrafts
Central Market Square - Sales and Discounts!
Come down and Lug a Rug home today!


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That's all for this week's Gazette and remember:
As We Live and Breathe, That's The News.



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7 comments
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Upvoted thanks for the polished writing!

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I have to mention that waverunners have both nostrils and gills.

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Gazette editors will issue a correction in the next issue :)
You'd think Yeen Aryngale would have mentioned something...

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